You can have a dozen self-help books, read them and resolve to apply the lessons in life but it’s not certain that you will do as you have thought. Mostly motivation doesn’t last long. A raw motivation is like a sun; it shines brightly for some time but vanishes soon when darkness begins. To get lasting motivation, you need ripe motivation. Who can teach you about motivation and life better than a dying man? Re-live with 15 Life lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie.
In the novel, Morrie is the psychology teacher of Mitch Albom who meets Morrie after 16 years. He is shocked to find that his loving teacher is dying because of ALS disease. They start their last project together, a project about death. The student records the wisdom of his teacher. 15 life lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie are those lessons that Morrie shared with Mitch.
15 Life lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie
1. A fulfilling life deserves your answers
Morrie asks some simple questions. Answering them will reveal how you care for your life.
- Have you found someone to share your heart with?
- Are you giving to your community?
- Are you at peace with yourself?
- Are you trying to be as human as you can be?
You might have not come across these questions yet but these are equally logical as any Newton’s law. To share your feelings, being generous, having a calm soul and be more human is true life.
2. Accept to be at peace
Struck with a life-threatening disease Morrie used it to create life-changing philosophies.
“Accept what you are able to do and what you are not able to do.” It is not wrong to be unable to change something. Be at ease with accepting it.
“Accept the past and past, without denying and discarding it.”
If you want to treasure your past, put only smiles in the memory lane, no tears. It’s easier to say than to do but at least try.
3. Dying is different than living unhappily
“To be sad because of dying is one thing and living unhappily is the other.”
It’s obvious to be sad because of dying but at least don’t be sad while living. It’s ok to cry over death but while living choose smiles over tears.
4. Choose a culture that nurtures you
Don’t choose the culture that doesn’t allow you to be happy. Throw that culture that doesn’t give you the freedom to feel good about yourself.
“If cultural doesn’t work, don’t buy it.”
Most people are sadder than a dying person because they embrace the wrong culture. Create your own culture, the one that set you free. If you can’t create it then don’t pick the wrong culture too.
The so-called necessary things like a good social status, rich career, paying bills, having a family take away most of our time. And we realize other things were more important only when we are old enough or sick to die. This is what culture does to us.
Are these the only things you wanted in life?
Is there something missing, something that your bank balance can’t buy? Figure out the something before you die.
5. Life has a tension of opposites
Advising Mitch on the confusion of life Morrie explained the tension of opposites. He says life is a tension of opposites. You desire to do something but you are compelled to others. You allow people to hurt you knowing you should not. You take things for granted in spite of realizing that they should be respected.
Life is like a rubber band, it experiences pull in the opposite direction from the ones you wanted. You lie somewhere in the middle of the two directions of desire and necessity. And the direction where your love is wins.
“Love Wins. Love always wins.”
6. Distractions don’t deserve your time
Upon your deathbed, you will look back and wonder why those distractions mattered so much to you? Was wasting your time watching a stranger’s shows on TV worth it? While spending hours on TV, have you spent seconds to know yourself?
Also Read: Life Lessons from Overheard in a dream
7. Is there a purpose in your actions?
People are busy doing things they think are important. They give excuses defending the necessity of needless activities. This is why people are sad because they are after the wrong things and know it.
“Don’t just sleepwalk in life, open your eyes, forget sleep and walk towards your dreams.” – kidy upitd Himanshi
Add purpose, devote your life to others, never do things that your heart discourages. There is no need of ignoring your heart. The most foolish thing is neglecting the desire of the heart while knowing you shouldn’t.
8. Don’t ignore simple things
Do you appreciate the sunset or beautiful trees? You may not appreciate them now but if it would be your last day you would wait to watch a beautiful natural scene.
Morrie says that he appreciates things like being able to run because he couldn’t do it. Whatever you have could be a treasure from a dying person’s eyes. Don’t ignore what you have.
9. Dreams depend on you not on circumstances
Morrie concluded the way to success in one sentence.
“If you really want it, then you will make your dream happen.”
10. Open doors to let love in
The most important thing to learn in life as Morrie says is to know how to give out love and let it come in.
Sometimes we think we don’t deserve it or loving will make us weak but love is the only strength we have. Auden, a poet has said, “Love each other or perish.”
Morrie said it beautifully- “Without love, we are birds with broken wings”
11. Silence is beautiful
In one class Morrie didn’t begin lecture as soon as he entered in the class. The discussions begin after 15 minutes.
The silence between his entry and the start of the class was awkward. But why is silence awkward or embarrassing? We find comfort in the clutter of noise but not in the serenity of peace.
Silence is beautiful in relations. Morrie says about one friend that they have 35 years of friendship, so even if with the disease he couldn’t speak, he would communicate to his friend. “You don’t need speech or hearing to feel that friendship,” he says.
12. Set a limit to self-pity
To cry isn’t a weakness neither is feeling a little self-pity. But important thing is to put a limit on self-pity. Be Sad, cry, feel worthless but stop when your daily limit finishes.
With time, your time spent on self-pity will decrease and you will stop it eventually.
13. Trust people
You might not trust people sometimes but if you feel like it, then you should do it. You can trust people in dark and when falling too. It’s true that those people are less but not extinct.
14. You need a teacher, a Morrie for you
To find if we are heading in the direction we want, we need teachers. You need a Morrie to live more, smile more and be more. Honour the teachers you had and expect great ones to bless you in the future.
15. Learn to detach
“Don’t cling to things, because everything is impermanent,” Morrie explained to Mitch about detaching from experiences.
Feel experience fully, let every cell of your body absorb it and then leave it. If you stop from experiencing fear, grief, and sadness deeply, you will never be able to detach.
Accept what is happening, let your mind and body react to an emotion or experience and then let go. Like any cloth, wear your emotions, see how they feel and put the cloth away forever.
“Don’t let go too soon but don’t hang on too long,” Morrie teaches about balance.
These were 15 life lessons from Tuesdays with Morrie. The lessons are not over here, we have the second part too. A suggestion for you is not to read both the part one after the other. Read one, apply it and then return to the other part.
Tuesdays with Morrie could be your chance of the reliving with Morrie, cash the opportunity.
Also Read: How to be Happy